Funny Cat News

March 5, 2012

Too Much Milk Causes Cat’s Tail to Shrink!

Got Milk poster with man squirting milk into a Manx (tailess) cat's mouth.

Des Moines, IL–New Study shows too much milk causes cats’ tails to shrink!This picture says it all. “It’s not that Tiger’s tail was ever a tail to write home about. It wasn’t particularly bushy or long. It was just an ordinary tail,” says Emma, “But when milk started to be an addiction, his tail definitely started to shrink and shrink until there was nothing left, not even a nub.” She adds “It doesn’t seem to bother him much. He hasn’t stopped drinking milk.”

December 25, 2011

Holiday Greetings from Jesse

Mill Valley, CA- – Jesse Cat in His Christmas Best. Jesse Cat from Mill Valley sends his Holiday Greeting and Warm Wishes to all!

March 9, 2011

Gangs or UFO’s?

Tiny ginger kitten with knit cap on head in front of tuna cans.

Monrovia, CA–Once again, the authorities have been confounded by another large theft of Tuna at the local Monrovia Ralphs. New evidence has indicated that this may be UFO related. Anyone with information on this crime is urged to contact the authorities or post information at Stolen Tuna.

March 2, 2011

Tuna Thief Undaunted

Monrovia, CA–Despite upgraded security, the Tuna section in the Monrovia Ralphs was hit again. Authorities are baffled. Anyone with information on this crime is urged to contact the authorities or post information at Stolen Tuna.

February 26, 2011

KItty Planet’s Oscar Pick

Monrovia, CA–Kitty Free Press’s pick for the 2011 Oscars – the Fighter.

February 22, 2011

Tuna Thief Strikes Again!

White kitty with a duck head hat on in front of tuna.

Monrovia, CA–The local Ralph’s in Monrovia was devastated again at 8:00 am by another large theft of tuna. Says store manager, “We are not getting another shipment of tuna until Wednesday and this will pose a serious issue to our customers wanting tuna for their casseroles and such.” Anyone with information on this crime is urged to contact the authorities or post information at Stolen Tuna.

February 15, 2011

Tuna Casseroles on Hold

White kitty with pink rabbit ear hat in front of tuna cans.

Monrovia, CA- – For the third week in a row, the tuna section at a small local Ralphs in Monrovia, California has been devastated and depleted. Customers are outraged. Says one shopper, who wished to remain anonymous, “I have planned on making a Tuna Casserole for the last two weeks. I understand there is a recession going on – but this is ridiculous. How much tuna does one person really need? I hope the perpetrator is caught and put behind bars permanently because that is what they deserve.”

Says Roger W. Johnson, Police Chief of Monrovia, “We have two strong leads we are investigating. One theory is this may be gang related. The other theory is the possibility of a District 9 UFO conspiracy.” Chief Johnson declined further comment. Anyone with information is urged to contact the authorities or post information at Stolen Tuna.

February 8, 2011

Have You Seen this Cat?

Monrovia, CA–Police report a significant tuna theft at the local Ralph’s in Monrovia at 8:00 am. A significant amount of tuna in oil and water was stolen. Anyone with information on this crime is urged to contact the authorities or post information at Stolen Tuna.

February 3, 2011

Maximus Finds Christmas Ribbon

Williamsboro, TN– Maximus a large male tabby rescue with a fat tummy, confounds his owners by discovering Christmas ribbon after long after it had been packed up.